I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
