Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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