the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize