WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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