that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize