Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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