TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
