M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize