he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize