I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
