there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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