I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
