i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
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