i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
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