fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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