Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize