best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
