You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I cannot find my penis.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
