i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize