my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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