I hope mine doesn't look like that
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Randomize
