There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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