He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I am one with the molecules
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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