So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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