just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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