well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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