every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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