in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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