Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
