the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
