i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
