We're like a lot better than the average bears
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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