Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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