Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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