I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
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