I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Randomize
