we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
