Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
whose ass print is on the piano?
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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