Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
It was a blind-side dick pic.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
