Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
