This girl is more easily done than said...
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
babies were throwing up all over the place
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Randomize