he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I'm at about main and main street
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
