Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
