Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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