Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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