Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize