I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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