you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
