I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
