The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
it's like heaven, but drunker
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
